Are you enjoying yourself? - Tactical Ninja
Mar. 23rd, 2012
09:44 am - Are you enjoying yourself?
So one of my classes got switched. For my final course I was going to be doing "NGOs, the state and civil society" but apparently the lecturer for that is leaving and they've offered me "Emotion, social practice and policy" as a replacement. It's the same level in the same school. I considered swapping it for "Crime, deviance and popular culture" to complete a double major but the Dean of Humanities looked it up and apparently the CRIM major would require me to do another 300 level course afterwards. I've already met the requirements for my SPOL major and fuckit I am so done with undergrad study, so I'm taking the Emotions and running with them. I suspect it'll be interesting and given the emotionally-charged nature of drug policy conversations, I reckon it's as relevant as the course I had lined up.
It's been 6 months since I gave up smoking. Actually it's been a bit over 7 months but I kind of stopped counting. So what difference has it made? Hmm..
I suppose I'm financially better off, but frankly I didn't smoke that much to start with and I always smoked rollies which were the cheap option. Also, having started paying a mortgage and then having someone come and help pay, my finances have been all over the place and the small amount it cost me has just not really been noticed. I know that I'm not spending that money now but tbh I haven't noticed a difference in my pocket.
Also no difference in my sense of smell or taste - they were always pretty good.
I think I'm fitter, but again giving up smoking came with a decision to make a bunch of changes to my life such as taking the stairs at work instead of the elevator, getting a handle on my eating habits, making fitness activities a regular habit etc. I do cardio at the gym to test my fitness and I've been gradually upping the various difficulties, but I can't really tell if the not-smoking has helped my fitness improve or not.
Things I have noticed: I'm warmer. Again, this could be related to having a warm house to live in, but I've noticed myself needing less clothes when outdoors too. I think one of the things that nicotine does is shrink your capillaries so blood doesn't get to the skin or something, and I'm wondering if I now have improved blood flow or something. The other thing, and this is the most relevant for me, is that I am no longer self-conscious about how I smell. I feel much better about being in close proximity with other people. This is really nice.
There have been a couple of times when I've felt like having a smoke but for the most part I don't even think about it. I think part of the reason for this is that I was good and ready when I stopped - it was entirely an internal decision that had been on the cards for a while, so it's a bit like deciding you're going to learn to ride a motorcycle or starting to walk to work - you just do it because you decided to and that's that, you know?
Meanwhile, I'm now cooking (or eating things my lovely little family cooks) most nights. I habitually eat breakfast and only forget when Dr Wheel brings me coffee in bed because when I make the coffees is when I eat. Lunch is a daily habit. I'm learning to eat until I am ready to stop, but sometimes it's still a struggle because my urge is to eat until I'm stuffed even though I don't need to. I find this particularly hard at night, and my solution to that has been to serve myself X amount and stop with that rather than then going and having some 'afters' (that if I'm not careful will add up to another meal). So far so good, mostly I'm eating in a relatively healthy way - but changing this has been much harder than giving up smoking was. Weird.
We aren't quite vegetarian but this week with three meals containing meat has been an exceptionally meaty week, which is a huge reduction from where we were.
I'm still trying to make and eat new things at the rate of one or two a week.
In all, I think the decision to make changes that came along with deciding to give up smoking has been a success. Also, Dr Wheel and I are getting the hang of cohabiting. We've always gotten along really well but we're space-needing people. Luckily we're also independent people with our own things to do and so far we haven't been in each other's face too much. And I like the bit where I get home first and potter about doing my thing, with this happy little knowledge that he'll be along shortly, emitting his zenogens willy nilly and existing in my general direction. He's real and he's here and that makes me very happy.
So yeah. For the first time for a very long time when I did the monthly "Are you enjoying yourself?" round, I can unequivocally say "Yes, yes I am."
This morning in bed I scientifically tested out the Escher Girls theory. Turns out that I can actually contort myself into a position where someone can see my bum and breasts at the same time, but I doubt I'd be able to do any superheroing in that position. *cough*
Finally, my flamenco dress pattern arrived. Yes, I have to make it. For the challenge, you understand. Also because it's another option for lowscoopedback things. So the question is, for the first one which will be a practice run, what colours should I use? Please don't say red.