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When I was young and silly... - Tactical Ninja

May. 27th, 2011

09:29 am - When I was young and silly...

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OK feelgood time. This week has been SRS BSNS here in Tatsland, so here, have a Reddit thread about dumb things people have done to impress folks they fancy.

"Anyways, we leave the dance together and start walking across a field to our respective rooms. She then asks me if I "knew my way around the bedroom." I responded "Do I ever!"
I then proceeded to take off my shoes, tie the strings together, and toss my shoes into a tree. I told her I'd see her tomorrow. I then proceeded to climb the tree, to retrieve my shoes.

I now feel much better about my own attempts to impress my erstwhile coeds, which apropos of this, mostly involved trying to be more manly than they were. You can imagine how well that went la la la. Seriously, self esteem boost, over there in that thread.

And if you'd like to add self-depracation to the morning, tell me about the dumbest thing you did to impress someone. Here's mine.

I liked this guy and he kind of liked me back. He was going off to work as a shepherd on Te Paki station, and he needed a couple of horses. The guy I was working for had two unbroken ones he didn't want. 18 year old me had broken in a couple of horses and I was all "Yeah yeah I'll sort them out for you." 18 year old me was also a bit flaky and impatient. I'd been riding them round the yards and after two weeks of this I called him up so he could come have a look. He brought the station manager and a couple of the shepherds with him and I dutifully paraded one of the horses round the yard for him. Then they asked me to ride it out and opened the gate. Instead of thinking about, you know, self-preservation, I thought this was my chance to show him how awesome I was, so off I went and proceeded to try and get this horse to canter up the hill.

Horse, who was still struggling to balance a rider, trotted faster and faster, then broke into a canter, got all wobbly, spun round and bucked his way back down to the gate. I lasted about 0.00004 of a second and landed in fresh cowshit. The station manager had to catch the horse for me and I had to face these guys who to their credit were trying really hard not to laugh as I stumbled back to where they were.

Not my finest moment. Needless to say, after I'd done some more work on the horse and he took it home, I never heard from him again.

Also, I've found that my encyclopaedic knowledge of sheep is not really all that useful for impressing men either. ;-/ But I'm told that doing doorframe pullups in an evening gown and elbow length gloves is. So at 41 I'm still confused about these things.

Anyway, I'd love to hear about Not Your Finest Moment because I'm pretty sure everybody has one and reading that Reddit thread gave me a boost. Compared with some of them I'm a regular Lothario*.

* Anyone know what the female equivalent of that is - or even if there is one?

And in case you were wanting some SRS BSNS today, here's a petition against the TPPA. Be aware that when you read the text you need to scroll a bit. It has an unfortunate line break that makes it look like it says "cease work on any other in-progress or proposed international trade" and you have to scroll to see that it says "cease work on any other in-progress or proposed international trade and investment treaties containing clauses which limit or abrogate New Zealand's sovereign and democratic right to make and enforce laws."

So yeah, if you want to be a slacktivist and you're concerned about the TPPA (you totally should be), please go sign even if it's the only thing you do. Sadly not open to non-NZers.

I will be at Fidels tonight. I will eat chips and try not to envy Dr Wheel who is winging his way to Tokyo to see Tom Cosm play on top of a building. I made him promise to take pictures. ;-)



[User Picture]
Date:May 26th, 2011 11:41 pm (UTC)
1. I put a bag of heart sweets in a girl's letterbox.
2. I asked a girl out with a statistically relevant questionaire.
2. During a school musical I was in the choir and I liked one of the girls, and so I'd always stare at her trying to catch her eye. She just thought I was creepy.

These were all before I was 14. But to my credit the first two actually worked (where "worked" doesn't actually mean much when you're that young).

I am a little bit bewildered by having to get around in Tokyo, but I have a plan, so hopefully I won't get lost and eaten by radioactive Godzilla.
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[User Picture]
Date:May 26th, 2011 11:56 pm (UTC)
I would have been impressed by the statistically relevant questionnaire!
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[User Picture]
Date:May 27th, 2011 02:00 am (UTC)

Question 1.

Do you like me? ;-)
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[User Picture]
Date:May 27th, 2011 07:33 am (UTC)

Re: Question 1.

100% plus or minus.. ah bullshit. I can only do subjective comparative analysis on this one. Therefore you + me + like = singularity of awesome predicted with 98% confidence.

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Date:May 27th, 2011 01:24 am (UTC)
I have had many Not My Finest Moments.

Probably the most succinct was when some girl asked if I had a girlfriend, and I replied "What's your point?!".

I had a huge crush on a French girl in my Norwegian class. Astonishingly we semi-regularly engineered it that we would walk homeward to the T-bane together, so presumably there was some interest from her side too. Sadly this crush had built up to be such a huge thing in my mind that I was utterly unable to say anything interesting to her during these walks.

Not quite what you were asking for, but clearly the most ostentatiously crazy thing I did for some-kind-of-love: [SNIP, you surely don't want the details of this one cluttering your journal. Summary:] I once flew Dunedin to Toronto on a day's notice, all for nothing.

But all these pale in hilarity value beside my friend Mike's South African adventure: we were in Cape Town for a certain bike ride: http://www.cycletour.co.za/ .

The day before the race, Mike, a local friend-of-a-friend with whom he was getting on very well, and I went on a sightseeing trip up the coast to a town with lots of cliff paths and such. Mike decided he would show off with a little rock climbing. It was going great until a dinner plate-sized lump of rock came off in his hand, he fell a couple of metres, and the dinner plate bounced off his head on the way down.

The Girl In Question and I looked at him lying motionless on the ground a few metres below, looked at each other, and slowly came to the realization that maybe he was actually Not Okay. We climbed down just as he was regaining consciousness.

We spent the rest of the day exploring South Africa's emergency medical system. Way to impress a girl, Mike!

Amongst other things, he'd dislocated his shoulder. He still beat me in the race the next day, though...
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[User Picture]
Date:May 27th, 2011 01:31 am (UTC)
my encyclopaedic knowledge of sheep is not really all that useful for impressing men

I dunno that I'd be impressed, but it would certainly interest me, in a fact gathering way...

But then I'm a bit of an information sink (& source) at the best of times...
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[User Picture]
Date:May 27th, 2011 02:16 am (UTC)
I asked my husband about this because we have very similar ego/id expressions. He agreed, and I have to say, I haven't really witnessed it with him, either.

When I'm trying to impress someone I don't really go for the grand feats of stupidity. I'll be louder, or more brash, or just generally say something very dumb indeed. Feats of stupidity are all on my own, though. I have no worthwhile excuse for them like trying to impress someone.

I do have Epic Clumsiness. If you put me in a sensory deprivation chamber for an hour, I'd be likely to break or strain something. I've fallen down standing in a 2 foot by 2 foot space. Not juggling or doing anything complicated. Just standing.

I don't know what the hell that is, but it's special, that's for sure.
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