tatjna (tatjna) wrote,

They call it trance for a reason

This morning I dropped my car off at the shop. In 3 or 4 days' time it will be Shiny! And Fixed! And Not Falling Apart! This makes me very happy. The sunshine on my 2km walk from the shop to work also made me happy, especially given the foreboding of nasty weather last night, what with the wind and the rain and the like.

The sheep-dagging mission went very well, they are all now clean, eyewigged, drenched and separated. We decided to go for colour segregation, since as it turns out there are more pregnant than coloured, and the home farm can't support that number of lactating ewes.

I hope the horses don't kill too many lambs.

Supposedly, the ram was only in with them for half a day. However, given that on countback that would mean they were due on or around the 17th of October, and they're springing up already, that implies that he was in there closer to a month. Sheep cycle every ~17 days, so he was in there for 2 cycles, which means he's got pretty much all of them. Yes, sheep are that horny. That's one of the reasons they survived as a species despite their relative defencelessness. They breed like rabbits.

After the sheep were all sorted and safely back in their respective paddocks, I went home, showered and had a Nana Nap. Yes, me. She who can't sleep during the day. Colour me ecstatic. Three hours later I was woken by thundering on my door and carted off to scramble up and down some hills with First, followed by fish and chips and conversation - a great way to finish a Sunday.


Visiting Mum, some gardening, seeing various neighbours, dancing with cool people, a bit of sheep work, reading fiction, napping, walking the dog with cool people.. that's how a weekend should go. I feel.. as if I have time for things like napping. As if I'm achieving a form of balance, where there's room for everything in my life. I don't know how much of the way I'm feeling right now is to do with afterglow, but it's nice and I'd like more of it. Much more.

*crosses fingers for an ability to maintain this*

On ego:

"Ego is the temporary confusion which can obscure our experience of basic goodness. Ego makes us feel separate, alienated, confused and is the cause of suffering. Ego is based on duality: awareness is in "here", space is out "there", subject and object, I and other, thinker and thought, me and mine, us and them.

Non dual awareness has no "I" and no "other", just a single inclusive experience. Our experience is like an image reflected on the mirror of our mind. Images appear but the mirror of basic awareness itself remains unbiased and totally open to whatever appears.

The first step is to clearly identify the difference between the ego state and the non-ego state in the stream our own being. Once we clearly see the contrast between ego and egolessness we can choose between them."

From here - a site dedicated to the pursuit of enlightenment through dancing. Not the dervish, ritualised kind either, but the kind of dancing I do. I often achieve a meditative state while dancing, and I always come out of it feeling refreshed, renewed, and better. I know that the kind of extended dancing that goes with a night out for me, produces a lot of endorphins, but I actually think there's something else going on there too, and I'm interested in exploring that. Hence the site I linked to. I don't agree with everything they say, but there's definitely a hint of what I feel in there, especially to do with the loss of ego and heightened awareness.

And it's really weird when you're in this state and getting your groove on and someone comes up to you and asks you where they can score some E. Especially when they won't take "I don't know" for an answer. Hi, I'm dancing and obviously enjoying myself, therefore I must know where all the good drugs are! Hehe. Or better still, when some 18-year-old starts using all his pickup lines on you, one after the other. This is the point when I wish I were better at channelling fuvenusrs so I could come up with witty comebacks. Usually I just grin inanely and dance away.

I am not good at this whole nightclub scoring merry-go-round thing. I'm not even interested in it. I like to be at events where people are there to dance - it's one of the reasons I like psy parties. Yeah, they may be full of hippies, but they're also the kind of place you're least likely to get hit on.

For me, hitting on me while I'm dancing is like propositioning someone in a church while they are praying. Don't do it, kthxbye.

Also, the equinox was yesterday, and several of the people in my life have had good news over the weekend, so can I just say Yay for them, and I hope things continue on the up and up for you all.

PS I need some new music. What are you listening to?
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