tatjna (tatjna) wrote,

Stop hitting me over the head, I can do it better myself

Life seems to be going back to almost kinda sorta normal. As in, today I actually feel like I'm part of this world. And my alarm is going off at OHGOD o'clock again. And there's a warm manly thing in my bed. ;-) And the Kiwiburn forum is going nuts (three weeks to go! got your ticket yet?), I'm deciding between boots and shoes instead of sandals and bare feet, and suddenly all my evenings are full without space for just blobbing by myself.

Note to self: self-blobbing time is important. I took some last night, and spent most of it feeling guilty because I *cough*should've*cough* been spending it catching up with people I haven't seen for a while/doing projects/insert anything other than taking blob time for myself here.

Will I ever learn? Tats - take at least one evening for a week, tell everyone and everything to piss off, and sit on the internet playing inane games or read a book or whatever, as long as it isn't productive. *nod*

It's only about 6 weeks till uni starts. I've been having a case of the Whatthefuckamidoings. You know, where you wonder how you'll pay for it, whether you'll cope with the three-times-weekly dash up the hill to lectures and tutorials, how you'll organise still more time spent doing course work without compromising lifestyle, whether you're really interested enough to make the sacrifice..

... whether you're actually capable of doing it.

Yay for self-doubt! Keeping one awake at night, and plaguing sleep with failure dreams.

Type A personality: Hi! I'm here to take over your world!

Me: *meep*

Type A personality: While I'm at it, isn't it time you cleaned the house, learned a language, organised several charitable events, got a degree, cut your hair, and made half a dozen clever projects, all while balancing on one leg and juggling meetings?

Me: I don't remember signing up for this... *hides*

But! I have Tommy for another week. He is growing up amazingly. He can converse in quite an in depth way about abstract things, like the morality of law, the necessity of boundaries, and the way that people's feelings affect the way they interact. He's got a manipulation detector that's almost as big as mine too.

Smart kid. I'd like to claim genetic responsibility for that. ;-)

[EDIT] I just ran out of staples. I have used one box of 5000 staples in the 2 years and 9 months I've been here. That's 20.58 staples a week. 4 a day. You needed to know that.

  • Post a new comment


    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

    When you submit the form an invisible reCAPTCHA check will be performed.
    You must follow the Privacy Policy and Google Terms of use.