tatjna (tatjna) wrote,

The first goodbye

It was hard saying goodbye to Ralph last night. He pulled his usual face at me complete with wiggly bunny ears and I had to leave quickly.

I am a sap.

Also, to the wanker who snapped the driver's side wiper off my car for no good reason - you suck. To the people who don't sell whole wiper assemblies because "They are all so different from each other" - you suck too.

I am resisting the urge to withdraw all my savings and buy a one-way ticket to Somewhere Where I Know Nobody And It Isn't Raining - where there are smells of coffee and herbs in the street, where music is just music and not some kind of badge of one's social standing, where it's warm enough to wear (or not-wear) the clothes I really want to, where people dance outside in daylight..

Because with all this stripping away of things, I think that maybe, once the layers and layers of social conditioning inhibition baggage bullshit are burned away (yes it burns), maybe what is left is exactly what I'm looking for. And maybe that inner core is capable of changing the place where I am right now - or my perspective of it.

Tats Four Word Rules For Life No.2: It's All About Perspective.

Things are changing. I can feel it.

Also, again with the desire to dance around naked in the rain. And - a couple of years ago, someone gave me the Best Birthday Present Ever (a drawing tablet). I haven't used it much lately, but I can feel the urge coming on. I know what this means.. *secret smile*

I am listening to this.
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