January 5th, 2016

happy

Stunning revelation

Not really, more of an observation.

This Christmas, I got just under two weeks off. For those not in the know, in NZ it's common to have forced closure of workplaces over Christmas, which when you factor in the public holidays gives people 2-3 weeks off for the consumption of only 4-10 days of leave, depending on how long you're off work.

For me, because of Kiwiburn, I took the shortest I was allowed, which added up to the 24th of Dec to today, or 12 days.

The first 2 days were focused on Christmas, then we went on a road trip for four days. By the end of that I was in holiday mode. Things I observed happening within myself:

1. Happier
2. Improved sex drive
3. Sleeping till 7:30am
4. Cravings for sugary food decreased to almost none
5. Rash cleared up
6. Scheduling rest time among 'things to do' as part of day

Neato! We got back to Wellington last Tuesday. I enjoyed 2 days of this, then on Thursday, I woke up thinking about work. I was able to put it out of my mind, but the feeling of impending doom was there, and growing. Almost immediately I went to the dairy, bought a tub of ice cream, and scarfed the lot. I lost interest in sex again, and started waking up at 5:30. I made the most of my last four days of holiday, but my mood slowly sunk as going back to work approached and now my rash is back as well. This morning I woke up at 3:30, and again at 4:30, and 5:00, and 5:30.

What this is telling me is that work is probably the biggest source of stress in my life, and when I'm not having to work, I'm infinitely happier and healthier, and it doesn't even take long to start improving when I stop.

This is really a no brainer.

So now I need to figure out how to reconcile the fact that work makes me unhappy and sick, with the fact that I have to support myself.

Part time seems a possible solution..