April 5th, 2011


In which I talk about what's getting to me right now

I've decided that rather than tackle The Dress straight up after not having sewed for a while (last thing I made was Joel's Matrix coat), I'll do something else I've been meaning to - first, patch my percussion pants* and then make a couple of new pairs of Thai farmer pants. Back in the Day, rivet gave me these pants, they were ones she wore when working in fields in Thailand with Thai farmers. They are different from the standard Thai fisherman pants in that they have a simple tie at the front rather than the wraparound thingy that the fisherman ones have. Other than that they have all the same advantages - lightweight, comfy, easy, etc. My pair are on their last legs and I need some more. They look simple to make so I'll give it a go.

Today's mission is to go get some light cotton for those. The secret agenda is to be inspired by other fabric while there and suddenly have a complete picture of The Dress spring into my mind at the same time. Cunning, me.

* otherwise known as arse castanets. Ask Jodi or Rhi.

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And all this is messing with my head. I look into the future and all I see is bleakness for the world. The last time I felt like this was in the 1990s - but back then I knew if I could just get a job my life would be better. Now, I have a job. My life is better. And I know more about the world and right now, everywhere I look seems to point in one really depressing direction, with seemingly no relief.

I'm an optimist. I want to believe that people are good. I need something to counter this onslaught of doom that seems to be happening in my awareness. I want to withdraw my consent. I want to be wrong about this.

Yeah yeah, I want doesn't get. I know. Fuck.

Someone please tell me I have this all wrong.