August 12th, 2005


Men are from earth and women are from, well.. earth

OK so everyone's heard of Why Men Don't Listen and Women Can't Read Maps, right? I saw the title of this and went "Bollocks. Big round hairy lop-sided ones." Men do so listen, and women can so read maps. Go on, tell me I can't. It would probably be better titled Why Some People Don't Listen And Lots Of People Can't Read Maps - Because They Haven't Learned How To Yet, And Now You Don't Need To Read The Next 200 Pages.

But, I have found something about men and maps. Ever had a guy draw you a map or point out directions on one for you? Have you noticed how they make the car noises whenever they move their finger from place to place? "So next you turn left and drive up to the roundabout here - VROOM! Keep going straight through and along the motorway - Zhoom! Get off at Porirua - Brrrm! And you're there.." Some even put in the gear changes.

Go on, try it. Find a man and ask him to draw you a map (preferably one who doesn't read this, for experimental purposes). Naturally there will be exceptions to this, but it's common enough for yours truly to notice it. So, when I crack up laughing when someone's giving me directions, it's not because I can't read the map. I'm thinking of potential titles for my book.

Why Men Make Car Noises And Women Pick Fluff Off People?

Why Women Check Themselves Out In Shop Windows And Find Fault, And Men Check Themselves Out In Shop Windows And Think They Look Hot?

Understanding Your Partner Through Onomatopoeia?

Yes, all that capitalisation hurts my fingers.

PS I like it when it stops raining for just long enough for me to catch the bus.