April 26th, 2005


No, I'm concentrating on work, really.

This morning I was thinking about the government department that I'm paid to interact with, and how the usual method of communicating with them is known as XXXX-speak, which they hate. They like to think of themselves as clear, plain English type folk. And they are. But, nobody actually talks like that. I mean - "Log records steps taken during process in chronological sequence, and demonstrates use of selected methods to be used." Okay, it says exactly what it means, but please..

So, while I was thinking, this little ditty, ganked from notabouthim was running through my head:

Let us help you with your thoughtcrime
Let us help you with your thoughcrime
Double-plus-ungood - hey hey!
What is two plus two today?

Newspeak, in fact. Which led to thoughts of 1984. And, all ethical debates about changing history to suit the current philosophy aside, I think I would enjoy Winston's job. Playing detective, finding all the relevant information surrounding a given subject and being creative in making subtle changes to tie it all together to a cohesive whole that works would satisfy my inclination towards puzzles and research. OK, and my need to be incredibly anal on a cerebral level. In fact, it's not that much different from what I do now. And all you coders out there.. *winks*

However, I think I'd probably also use the opportunity to be subversive and take the piss and therefore end up with my head stuck in a cage of rats (except in my case it would be spiders). At least my government department doesn't torture people - at least not overtly. Theirs is a more subtle form of torture involving slow smothering under their 'hierarchy of verbs' and rules about 'avoiding passive restatements'. And I like it.

Which makes me slightly masochistic. Sexcrime, anybody?