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Smelly teenage birds ftl - Tactical Ninja

Dec. 22nd, 2011

08:58 am - Smelly teenage birds ftl

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Today is the solstice, the longest day of the year, and also tieke's birthday. Happy Birthday! I hope the next year is everything you hope it will be, and filled with non-allergenic kittens. Also, I get a kick out of knowing that two of my close-people were born on the solstices (the YoT was born on winter solstice).

Today is also my last day of work. We're off home at lunch time. Tomorrow I will wake up and be all HAHA I DON'T HAVE TO GET UP IF I DON'T WANT TO and then I will get up. But it will be because I want to. This year I am so ready for a holiday. Work has been tough and the result of the election means it'll just get tougher. I doubt my job is in danger but I have been pushing shit uphill with a teaspoon and the government would like to swap my teaspoon for a toothpick and take away my rubber gloves. Yay. So yeah, holiday.

Meanwhile, the starlings are fledging. There's a nest with three babies just across the roof from where I am, and said babies can't fly very far yet, so guess where they fly? Yeah, right to my balcony. And then they scratch around in my pot plants. I got home yesterday and two of the buggers had scratched up my marigolds and there was dirt and bird shit all over the balcony. It's like having bloody chickens. So, given that I can't wring their necks and eat them like I did with the chickens when I couldn't keep them out of my garden, what do you suggest I do to save my plants from the little fuckers?

I am probably not allowed to use one of these eh:



Maybe hanging up tinsel or something? I'm pretty sure they'll be off to have their own lives soon when their parents get sick of them hanging out on the couch playing xBox and eating all the food, and I'd like to encourage that by making my balcony less inviting to them. Yes I really am going HEY YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN, city styles.

Exciting things in the next week: 2 days till Dr Wheel Day, 3 days till Presents and Food Day, 5 days till Jodi Day. *squee* And last night I got me a dose of dreadbeard which always gives my brain something to chew on. I am glad you went and had adventures, Bunny, but I'm also glad you came back. ;-)

Comments:

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From:vernacularity
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:05 pm (UTC)
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netting.

with barbs.

and there is no reason you cant wring their necks, just the eating wouldn't be great.
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From:vernacularity
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:07 pm (UTC)
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if pigeons are rats, starlings are possums-of-the-bird-world. they get in your roof and won't fuck off or shut up.
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From:tatjna
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:11 pm (UTC)
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Things I didn't know about urban living - the birds are not scared of you.

If I leave a door or window open, sparrows will come in and hop around in the lounge and kitchen. If I disturb them, instead of panicking and flying into the windows, they calmly fly to the nearest exit and disappear. After having crapped on something.
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From:tyellas
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:12 pm (UTC)
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Yeah, I'm this close to getting another cat not because I'm aching for one, but because starlings are assholes.
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From:tatjna
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:09 pm (UTC)
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From:tatjna
Date:December 21st, 2011 10:41 pm (UTC)

Natural progression

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From:tatjna
Date:December 21st, 2011 10:53 pm (UTC)

Re: Natural progression

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I checked the BC rules and unless it comes under "Using the property for a purpose intended to make money" (military testing) or "Using the property in a manner that may disturb other residents" (fallout, spark showers, eardrum-destroying percussions etc), then I think any or all of those methods are ok. Tanks, nukes and rockets are not specifically excluded.

However, I think we should test it for efficacy before lugging it up the stairs. Therefore, you first.
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From:tatjna
Date:December 22nd, 2011 12:14 am (UTC)

Re: Natural progression

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If you can wave your Dick around at your place and effectively scare birds without hurting anyone or getting arrested, then I will let you bring it to mine.
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From:slavezombie
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:12 pm (UTC)
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Birds are pretty resilient eaters. I have a black bird with a white patch on it’s chest (I don't know what species) and he comes around to eat the tiny hot peppers off a small chili bush. TBH, I pick up bird seed to feed the wrens and finches flying about. It calms me to see them group together on my porch.

I thought the winter solstice meant it was the shortest day of the year, and the summer solstice is the longest day; that is, unless you live in the southern hemisphere.
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From:tatjna
Date:December 21st, 2011 08:15 pm (UTC)
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I live in New Zealand and today is the summer solstice. ;-)

Also, I'd be a lot happier about the birds in my porch if my flowers, herbs and washing weren't all feeling the impact of said birds.
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From:explicitreality
Date:December 21st, 2011 10:35 pm (UTC)

Starlings

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I generally spend time making the patio a haven for the birds, not shooing them off, but my cats help clear the space by spending the day dozing in the sun and attempting to eat birds. Kitten for Christmas? Perhaps a clever tortoise-shell to keep you amused. She'll probably dig the hobbies, too.
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From:explicitreality
Date:December 21st, 2011 10:39 pm (UTC)

Re: Starlings

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Oh, and HAPPY SOLSTICE


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From:whatifitworks
Date:December 21st, 2011 11:02 pm (UTC)

Festive Razor Wire?

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Ross has been talking about making some festive razor wire for some years now to keep the birds out the veggies :)
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From:downwardlashes
Date:December 22nd, 2011 02:09 am (UTC)
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Fake rubber snakes! My in laws swear it works.
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From:vernacularity
Date:December 22nd, 2011 02:52 am (UTC)
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NZ birds don't know what a snake is! Maybe a rubber cat...
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From:downwardlashes
Date:December 22nd, 2011 03:01 am (UTC)
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Haha, I thought of that after I posted.
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From:dreadbeard
Date:December 22nd, 2011 03:19 am (UTC)
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I think of myself as a brain lick, rather than a chewy substance.
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From:tatjna
Date:December 22nd, 2011 07:53 am (UTC)
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My brain needs to learn to lick rather than chew. This way I might scare the drunk academics less. My friends seem to cope just fine, but still, more than one mode of ingestion is probably good right?
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From:38
Date:December 22nd, 2011 07:49 pm (UTC)
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Awww cute little birdies!
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