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In which Kestrel runs a druffalo into Haven for shits and giggles - Tactical Ninja

Dec. 5th, 2014

09:02 am - In which Kestrel runs a druffalo into Haven for shits and giggles

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Because why not? They make an open world adventure game, I'm gonna have open world adventures! Also, my foray into baiting a dragon ended in flames (except for Varric who's so short that the wall we were standing beside protected him, but then he was alone and much as I like Varric, I don't fancy playing the whole game as him, so I sacrificed him too).

Uh, anyway..


First, go out into the woods. The snowy woods. Don't ask me why these giant cow things live in the snowy woods, they just do.

Then, find your druffalo, which will be minding its own business, looking at the snow going Y I NO CAN EAT YOU?



Then, shoot at said druffalo. As it turns out, the first time I only shot it once and it only chased me a short way, so I had to go back and harrass it some more. From this I learned that druffalo are slow to anger, and also that in this game, aggro really is damage-dependent. So anyway, poking giant cows with fireballs eventually leads to chasing scenes:



This time it chased me all the way back to Haven, and through the folks practicing hitting each other outside the walls - who were so absorbed in practicing hitting each other that they completely ignored the fact that their revered Herald was running like snot through their midst with a giant cow hot on her heels.



I particularly like that woman who's strolling nonchalantly through the middle of the shot, carrying what looks like a cup of tea. Either Haven soldiers are super hardcore, the druffalo is actually a figment of my imagination, or the game mechanics don't allow for druffalo-baiting as a team sport.

As it turned out, the beast couldn't go through the town gates so I couldn't take it into the Chantry. It got stuck in the gateway and lost all its aggro, and I couldn't shoot at it from inside either. Haven takes pacifism to the extreme. It probably explains why all the soldiers practicing hitting each other with swords are outside the gate too. And I had to jump over the stuck druffalo and start shooting it again to get it out of the gateway. It wouldn't be the first time a cow standing in a gateway has ruined my plans, just saying.

So anyway, I decided to see if I could drum up some help from Cassandra, but she was just as oblivious as all the others. Eventually we ended up trying to take down some tents:



Note to self: tents are druffalo-proof. So they might also be dragon proof. Perhaps I can hide in a tent next time I stumble across a dragon while I'm out picking daisies or something. Also, it almost looks like the guy with the sword in the above pic has noticed that there's a giant cow about to flatten him, but alas, he's actually more interested in brandishing his blade at whoever's standing in front of him.



Even when the druffalo is *ON FIRE* he still ignores it. Dude, there is a giant flaming cow in its death throes two feet away and you are ignoring it, what the hell is wrong with you? Although, you can see the hooded guy running away in the bottom right corner. Thanks, Hooded Guy, for running away from the druffalo now that it's dead. Chur.

These are the soldiers with which I am expected to save the world.


So there you go. Vitally important information about Inquisition - shared!

I am not sure the photo series Kestrel Baits A Dragon will be quite as straightforward. But she'll try it anyway. Because she's like that.

Comments:

[User Picture]
From:m_danson
Date:December 4th, 2014 08:10 pm (UTC)
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BBQ!
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From:tatjna
Date:December 4th, 2014 08:12 pm (UTC)
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Sadly, the invisible scavengers are so quick in this game that if the cow doesn't disappear altogether, all you're left with is a pile of bones and hunk of chewy leather.

I'd kill for a steak.

Edited at 2014-12-04 08:12 pm (UTC)
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From:llearch
Date:December 5th, 2014 01:44 pm (UTC)
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... and have. ;-]
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From:pundigrion
Date:December 6th, 2014 11:24 pm (UTC)
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Hahaha! I love me some unintentionally hilarious game mechanics.
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